eric bana

Dear premarital teacher man, (who bears a shocking resemblance to Eric Bana in the movie Troy) :

I guess I can't really call you that since you aren't a licensed professional... even though the church insists we should listen to you for advice about our almost marriage, (and you DO look like Eric Bana, which I find a bit sketchy...)

I dislike the way you pretend to bond with us by telling obscure and pointless stories from your own life that take longer to tell than they actually did to live out.

And even though you keep trying to pry the "rose colored glasses" from my eyes, I keep telling you I lost those long ago and now you are just scratching up my corneas with all of your probing.

Also, making us watch a video of someone else doing premarital counseling doesn't really count as you doing your job... I know you were over there playing solitaire on your laptop in the corner. 

FYI, from a girl to you... if there is any sort of crying involved, staring with bursts of nervous laughter probably isn't the best way to go. If you have a problem with emotions you might want to consider a different field of work, or just take couples who grew up on army bases.

Thats all for now, looking forward to never seeing you again.

-Jessie